minutiae you don't need to know

1. What time do you get up in the morning? after the tenth or twelfth snooze button

2. If you could eat lunch with one famous person, who would it be? gael garcia bernal (my future husband... HA!)

3. Gold or silver? silver

4. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? la mala educacion

5. Favourite TV show? laverne & shirley. yes. it's old. apparently, i have hated television since it went off the air.

6. What did you have for breakfast today? coffee & a cigarette w/ the surgeon general

7. What would you hate to be left in a room with you? a fly and/or a republican and/or military recruiter

8. Can you touch your nose with your tongue? no, but i can touch other people's noses with my tongue.

9. What inspires you? political transgressions, the odd & the obscure. the odd and obscure political transgression

10. What's your middle name? "gunslinger"

11. Favourite flower? orchid/tiger lily

12. If you had a big win in the lottery, how long would you wait to telephone people? i wouldn't. i might send an email, though.

13. Fizzy or still water as a drink? still water, unless i have nausea

14. What colour is your bathroom? mauve and grey

15. How many keys on your key ring? 10-15

16. Favourite day of the week? thursday--i have friday to look forward to.

17. What did you do for your last birthday? got older

18. Summer or winter? summer

19. Favourite ice-cream. jamocha almond fudge

20. Buttered, plain or salted popcorn? buttered

21. Favourite car? a non-demanding hybrid

22. Favourite food? the kind prepared by any other than me.

23. What characteristics do you despise? elitism, cronyism, jealousy, lack of motivation (what crap questionnaire is this?)

24. Favourite country to spend your holidays? pangaea

25. Beach, city or country? beach

26. whats under your bed? books, dust, papers... i'm sure a stray sock and some discarded tissue (used)

27. whats in the trunk of your car? the real question is "who?"

after/before/end of/beginning

consumerland--the most expensive place on earth--will use whatever temporal excuse to lure new shopppers during the holidays.

"after christmas sale,"
"pre-new year's sale,"
"end of the year sale,"
"new year's sale."

there's no art to these sales; they have them every damn year. why don't stores try less contrived ways to lure shoppers?

"after divorce sale,"

"s/he dumped you, now buy something to distract yourself sale,"

"alone on valentine's day annual sale,"

"the in-laws are coming to town sale,"

"nothing fits you since you cancelled your gym membership and lost your job sale,"

"you're self-esteem is low, so buy yourself some hot jeans sale,"

"you're clinically depressed but haven't been diagnosed yet sale,"

"just spend 50% more than you would at our 50% off sale, had you just stayed at home to save 100% sale,"

"you have absolutely no idea why you're wandering around in a mall, but you'll buy the first thing that just 'seems' necessary sale."

i think there would finally be a number of shoppers nodding their heads digging these kinds of sales. i hate shopping.


dreamers dream

dreamt last night that someone took my guitar stand with my capo attached to it. it was this woman who sort of looked like chrissy hinds from the pretenders. she mistakenly took mine for hers because she already had one exactly like that. i was surprised. would someone not be able to recognize something that wasn't theirs? i had to keep my guitar in its gig bag, instead.

i've done that. i've accidentally taken what was not mine. "d" knows. i accidentally took someone's dog squeaky toys at the grove. somehow, a plastic bag ended up in my hands as i waited for my coffee bean order. i had absolutely no idea how it got there. my dog was happy, though.