i think i needed this. i think parrish writes well on how it's necessary to channel your anger and your outrage into something productive and lasting. i do believe in "no business as usual," but i believe for people who have always been working for social justice--as a teacher, as a community worker, etc.--their "business" needs to go on. but... not as usual, of course. by that, i think it's necessary that now, more than ever (mao... more than ever--this was one of the most hilarious t-shirts i had ever seen... well. it's second to, "free the bound periodicals!") the connections need to be made between this racist war and the other inequalities existent in this society. (yes! this war is racist. would the corporate US war machines be as bold to attack france or england if they had the second largest reserves of oil in the world? by playing on the already-existent anti-muslim hate in this country and this country's stellar track record in hostility against all-things brown, it is "easier" to wave your flags for the "liberation" of some far-away brown brother in... in... "somewhere ober der in da middle east.") i believe that what makes the world go 'round for those in power is money; racism and the imperialism to which its married, just makes it much easier. in other words, it's not financially sound for those already with the wealth and power to create that "level playing ground," so shit. "let's bomb 'em." and let's bomb 'em with the brown and black brothers and sisters that we so artfully kept out of higher education and job opportunities on the front lines. if they don't want to fight, there's plenty of work in the prison system. now, that's action. and that's an affirmative.

so back to the plan.

how do i connect teaching with this war and my opposition to it? this guy, napoleon (and i don't mean the short, french guy) once said: "there's a lot of work to be done. but then again, there always was." to be continued...

the search continues...

i'm about to give up on finding heinrich's post. i have no idea what happened to his posts. sorry, deuteronomy. do you have them saved anywhere?

i've been glancing over other people's blogs. the one's i've come across have an eclectic mix of odd bathroom issues to wishy washy stances on the war. at one point, one of them cites footage from cnn and msnbc to say that "our military rules!... go US." indeed. go... AWAY from invading other countries you imperialist uncle sam! then there's this legal professor from UNC who uses antiseptic legal logic to justify what he claims isn't racial profiling of iraqi-born individuals. according to him, it's okay if the fbi seeks and questions some iraqi nationals. i wrote him asking if he knew whether or not the US government detained, interrogated or interned german-born individuals during the US war against the Axis powers during World War II. i'm waiting for his reply. on the radio, i heard more about how community colleges all over California are raising tuition fees over 100%. wow. the campaign to track america's poor, and youth of color into either the military or the prison system is well underway. why is affirmative action only working on the front lines of war or on death row? it gives new meaning to the call, "represent, hep! hep!" who the hell needs an education or health care! just give dubya his $75 billion! yeah. i love america. HI ASHCROFT!



i've just noticed that heinrich's posts over the past week have disappeared! i have no idea what's going on, other than pure conspiracy. heinrich: did you do this? how could you, though? you're not the administrator. i am. i'm disturbed...

coming next... eye.8.nothing! the search for heinrich posts continues...


how the other half is living

i'm a bit curious about these other blogs that i've found. i'm looking to see how (or if) they write about what's going on in the world (beyond a new york subway). they don't. but, do they indirectly? i guess these blogs would be my "blog candy."

coming next...more of the "serious" stuff. i'm still looking for "funny."


on "v's" post on last days...

commentator: when we last left off, "v" posted a comment with a link to his last days of the republic (dated: 3/24/03, "a reflection") on heinrich's post about a stone & soil eating swedish boy with obvious iron deficiency problems. "r" decided to comment on "v's" posting, but realized her superfluous nature required more than the limitations of his comment... "program?" on his blog. here is what she started to post:

it makes me sad to think how your mom had such anxieties when traveling through the midwest. it makes me sad because i've always had the same complex, as well. when my family first moved out of L.A. to live in various places in the midwest: michigan, kansas, nebraska, i really began to learn... shit! i can't write this all here! i'll write it here.

commentator: we now return to the continuation of "r's" comment (or now, post).

here. it wasn't until i lived in small, rural midwestern towns as a kid that i was made to learn and develop my own notions of "difference." from being accused of being a chocolate milk producer by taunting white boys in elementary school (get it? 'cause i'm brown. unfortunately hershey's was running the ad campaign that chocolate milk came from "chocolate cows." har-de-fucking-har), to being called, "chink," "nigger," "spanish fly," (i used to wear big glasses), etc. from culturally-starved, ignorant white people who hardly, if ever, saw a person of color--i had to learn quickly that i wasn't like many of the people in those towns. when i was younger, it did make me a bit agoraphobic when going out to public places where my family and i could meet--what to me were--strange, white and possibly hostile white people in town. as i got older, i was able to create a better niche in these places we lived when my family and i were able to surround ourselves with friends we would make over the years.

even when living in the midwestern "sticks" or "hickvilles," we were able to create our own community of friends. when i think of it, my parents made an effort to seek out other "others." they sought out and made friends with other disparate immigrant families also stuck in hickville--filipinos, indians (goan indians, in fact), turkish immigrant families, etc.--people who understood what it was like to be "alien" to the so-called "american dream" of apple pie and cheez whiz. i think it was during these times that i started developing my own notions of the "american dream." after seeing how hostile and ignorant the average white joe in the midwest could be to people of color, i started to think of the "apple pie" and the "baseball games in the park" as solely symbols for white americana. for me, feeling "at home" meant going with my parents to the "oriental" food market or to a local mexican or chinese restaurant because i knew people of color were expected to be there.

during this time, i found it ironic how my immigrant mother would work long hours in a veteran's administration hospital taking care of former american soldiers who fought for a country that sadly, never welcomed any of its immigrants with welcome arms. i remember someone saying that sometimes you can liken all the minor slights and insults brought on by discrimination to little cuts all over the body--the accumulation of which could really make one bleed one big hurt. i felt this for many years growing up, and i will never forget.

even still, i learned a lot from my parents. i remember my dad coming home one day telling me that he met some white guy at some golf course who kept badgering him with questions like, "what are you? mexican? chinese? japanese?" to this, my dad replied, "i bet i can guess what you are in one shot... nosy." from my dad i learned the art of the smart and subtle comeback. from my mother, i learned about how to face things head on--with no mercy and with an irrepressible attitude. one time when i was with her at some mall, a man walking past us could do nothing more than gawk at what must have been such an oddity to him--my mother and i. i remember my mother staring straight back at him and yelling, "what do you think you're looking at, huh? what, you think we're from another planet? you better stop staring at me! what's the matter with you?!" the man must have snapped out of it because he immediately cut his gaze and nervously moved along.

why do i ramble on with these anecdotes? i guess, "v," because i hope your mom doesn't have to hide or feel skittish anywhere she chooses to go or be. somehow, my family made it for almost 10 years in the midwest before moving back to (thank GOD!) california. i don't think i'll ever live in the midwest again unless, of course, i hear through the national census that a flood of immigrants have created a slew of multicultural urban centers there. it's not because i'm scared of living once again in pockets of all-white middle america, but because even more so, i know how valuable and important it is to live in culturally diverse places. you learn more about human nature and the world when you're around people who are different from you. for your mother, maybe you can encourage her to try to observe and learn a little bit about white, middle america. she may learn something about "how the other half lives." then, she can go back to living in l.a. and thanking her stars that she lives in a place where "brown" is a fashion trend that's not going to ever go out in style.

fascist brother is watching...

with a measly six corporations controlling the airwaves that are supposed to give us a window on the world, you have to laugh when die-hard patriots blindly support a dim-witted war criminal posing as a president when they say, "we got freedom of speech! we live in a FREE country!" HI ASHCROFT!!! how many fingers am i holding up?

what's wrong with my backBlog? for heinrich and his mirror

"so they co-existed in the same vein we might with a benign mole. no real harm, no real foul. the mole is happy, the host is content," but, when did you ever ask if how truly "content" the host really was?

"our primary objective is to survive above all else, at whatever expense. this is what i define as narcissism." it may make sense to you, as a man, that narcissism is the only expression possible for our objective of survival--but that's ignoring the fact that the his/herstory of the world did not progress solely because of the advancement of patriarchal societies within which you're content to live. remember matriarchal societies (and if anyone knows more about this, please fill me in since i'm not sure where i've gotten this--collective memory?) were traditionally known as hunter/gatherer social formations that were nomadic--meaning they ate and lay where they could hunt the prey. for these societies, there was no need for private property as in patriarchal societies. and within a matriarchy, there was no room for narcissistic motivations since every member needed to contribute to the group's survival. so where you stand by your limitations of what you've experienced, you should recognize that i, too, see "things as they are on the broader scale." i don't think people from immigrant families have any choice but to know what's on both sides of the scale when you come and you run between two different lands. remember, the other "r's" anecdote? "i am here, because you were there." and from what i know from my immigrant parents, we didn't move forward on purely narcissistic motivations, but from understanding the strength in community(ies) built with people from multiple homelands. so, yeah. an american imperialist invasion in iraq WILL have direct repercussions on all of us, and i'm willing to be part of the antibody to counter it. there is another world possible.