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9.05.2003



ee*ree*maht*soo*nah*noh*sah

erimatsunanosa--n. the fear of opening mail, paying bills and of imprisonment for the manslaughter of semi-truck drivers. often misdiagnosed for overactive imagination. (origin: chi-town, ca. 2003) ex: heinrich's ~ would be triggered whenever the postman drove up in his large truck to deliver his mail.



is there a phobia with a fancy name for this?

my room is a complete disaster. i had a good cup of chicory coffee tonight and it inspired me to try and begin sifting through this organizational nightmare of a room. i have over a month's worth of unopened mail--including bills that i have not paid. i think i have a phobia about opening mail and paying bills. it's so overwhelming that i can't seem to get myself to do it. my god. i really need to take a 2 week vacation to just go through the crap that has filled up my bedroom and pay my bills. what's wrong 2003? there's got to be a phobia named for the fear of paying bills and opening mail. well, maybe at least one for each, if not for both. UGH!!!! i must overcome this. i'm only good at folding clothes and making my bed. i'm scaring myself. i'm scared of myself. rimaphobia. billzaphobia. mailaphobia. i need an antidote right quick. i'm gonna cry.

9.04.2003



unmistakably...

being that it's summer and hot and i'm without air conditioning, i have my big windows open in the dining room. what's weird is the noises that come through. just now, i heard the piano from the movie, "amelie." my neighbor must be watching it. just like how "audiences across america agree," i like the film. not for the same reasons that i think others do (enter: here's how i'm unmistakably ME explanation.) i thought i killed truck drivers, once. just like the young amelie who is fooled into thinking that her instamatic camera causes catastrophe with planes, trains and automobiles, i thought i had caused the nameless deaths of many a truck driver.

when i was 6, i was accustomed to riding in the back of my parents' car making faces at truck drivers we'd pass on the freeway because i liked the way they took double takes whenever i made a face. for some reason, one night as i was watching some made for t.v. movie on juvenile delinquents, the idea hit me: what if i caused the drivers to have a truck accident?? at the time, i was also playing with my yo yo. when this idea came to me, i immediately looked down at my yo yo and became sad. it was only a matter of time before the cops found me, and then i'd have to go to jail... but, i knew they wouldn't allow me to bring my toys. i don't remember how i got over that one, though. i know i did vow to never make faces at truck drivers again.



filtered friendship

for the sake of email organization, i set up "rules" on my email program that sort my incoming emails into appropriate folders. I separate "personal" emails from "work" emails, etc. since i work with my best friend, "t," i've noticed that most of our emails are work-related. with my inbox filling up quickly with the amount of emails i'm receiving, i think i'll have to make the decision to amend the "rules" for my "work" filter and add her address to that folder... (gulp) so, that's what it has all come down to after all these years... work.